31 julio 2009

renewal

“Travel is glamorous only in retrospect.” - Paul Theroux

Most anthropologists (at least young ones) know this. This is the price we pay for the “glamour” of grants to take us to far away places(1) where we are adopted(2) by the natives(3) and given(4) special things to eat(5). We eventually write books that make our lives seem so out of the ordinary(6) and interesting(7). But the truth is, we are lonely like everyone else. We doubt ourselves, and cry at night, and miss loved ones and wonder why we didn’t just become comparative literature majors back when we had the chance.

Most days I look around La Paz and wonder how I'll spend a year here. Not to say that its awful: I actually quite like the weather. There's always something going on. I really like my neighborhood. I could sit in plazas and talk to people for hours. Life is cheap and good food is easy to come by. But its not home. Its a lonely place. And part of it is the language, but I always feel disconnected. Alien. I mean, I should feel out of place. I do not belong here. I am not a resident and not a tourist. I have no place.

But on friday nights, the city seems to open up. Granted, these are among the few nights I've places to go, people to see, things to do. But there's a glow to the city en viernes. A warm, yellow, homey glow. And people laugh, and the music is soothing, and the pisco sours taste like they should.

And tonight, in particular, I discovered some things. I was a little early for my dinner date (I was the 3rd wheel on the date), so i walked arounId sopacachi, and suddenly, unexpectedly, the sky was alight with fireworks. I've never been overly taken by fireworks. Even as a fairly young child I remember being bored with them. As I've grown older, I think this has disappointed a number of my friends. But fireworks at the right time can be magical. Not every night at 10 pm at Disney. Not at sundown on the 4th of july. But when fireworks pop up unexpectedly during otherwise magical moments, everything falls into place.

So eventually, the fireworks faded and I made my way to the Alianza Francesa for dinner. I still arrived ahead of my dates, but got a table and looked over the menu. For some reason I've never really liked french onion soup (on the menu of course, as sopa de cebolla con queso). But after a hearty french-oniony dinner party this winter, I thought I'd give it a go. and it was marvelous. I gobbled it up as I slurped Peru's signature beverage (I had to have one in honor of 28 de julio!).

I walked home content with good friends, food, beverages, and a city that, at this moment at least, felt like it could become home someday.

(1) or our own back yards
(2) or tolerated
(3) or the local residents & institutions
(4) in exchange for money
(5) usually just the bland local cuisine
(6) or alienating
(7) or trying

29 julio 2009

esta enferm@

so, i've been sick the last few days and therefore doing a lot of reading. mostly from Odd Tribes: Toward a Cultural Analysis of White People (Hartigan 2005) (review here), but today also an as-of-now unpublished paper a friend is writing on post-accord politics in guatemala.

In OT, Hartigan attempts to focus attention on the fact that classism within "whiteness" reaffirms and solidifies the hegemony of whiteness. Though I take issues with some of his approaches (which I fully intend to write about here eventually), he also makes some excellent points. One of which reminded me of a few films made by d'vine around election time.






Hartigan writes (p. 157) about Time reporter Steve Lopez's investigation of Southern whites' reasons for voting for George W. Bush in 2000. "More often than not, when I asked people "Why Bush?" it was as if they had zinc deficiency. The smile would freeze, the eyes would cloud, and all signs of intelligence would fade." Hartigan comments, "This image reproduces the most enduring images of rural poor whites: faded or absent intelligence, stemming from some sort of indelible physical deficiency."

Now, as a disclaimer (#1), i think that d'vine is a fantastic professor, advisor, humanitarian, activist, writer, and person in general. But my point is he is falling into a common trap in which it is ok to disrespect certain types of peoples' opinions because they don't quite jive with the ways in which the upwardly mobile, urban, liberal, well-traveled, lucky ones think. And I'm not condoning the racism and other -isms present in the narratives in his short films. But I also think the particular way they are framed (and perhaps edited) contributes to disrespect. And I think the second film illustrates particularly well the way in which the filmmaker (and presumably viewer) are positioned as morally and intellectually superior to Noe. We are invited to approve of and commend him for his decision. Had he decided differently, we would be invited to judge him disapprovingly.

(disclaimer #2-these videos were not intended to be "neutral" ethnographic accounts, but rather campaign tools, and i'm sure, if dr.vine were to conduct true ethnographic work on such people, the results would be stunning and beyond reproach)

now, back to the texan's article on Maya Guatemala: He explores reasons that many Maya seemingly contradictorily back right aligned political movements. In reviewing literature on similar topics he writes that many authors give important counterpoints to pervasive racist ideas that ignorant Mayas are tricked into aligning themselves with right wing politics.

So my point here is that in some ways this illustrates Hartigan's idea that phenotypically "white" but otherwise degraded individuals and groups are treated in similar ways to racialized "others" in different places. Obviously, all is not the same between rural Southern whites and the Maya of Huehuetenango, but I think the questioning of political affiliation without thick analysis is dangerous.

28 julio 2009

lucha blog

its weird when you show up in your own google reader.

26 julio 2009

cuy


i just wanted to point out that i made this comment 3 weeks ago...
(you think you're so clever otto-ok, maybe you are, just behind the times)

suspicions confirmed

24 julio 2009

mas preguntas

i'm having one of those days. nothing seems right.

who the hell am i to be doing research?
do i really want to do research abroad?
do i really want to do research at all?
how the hell am i going to get any sense of what's going on here in a month?
how the hell am i going to get any sense of what's going on here in a year?
how the hell am i going to write a dissertation proposal?
how the hell am i going to write a dissertation?
do i really like this whole "academia" thing?
am i really cut out to be an anthropologist?
am i ever going to get over my shyness?
am i ever going to get a handle on spanish?

...definitely one of those days that asks questions.

21 julio 2009

que quieres?

i am convinced of one thing: people who tell me my spanish is good want something from me.
usually money or sex.

shoeshine boys and creepy 35 year old men from cochabamba say "Tu espanol es muy bien"
bullshit.

la lucha

today marks the 4 year anniversary of the day i read this.

that's right, for 4 years i dreamed of the day i might see the "cholas" wrestling. i hoped to see the power of revolution in performance. i anticipated moralization of gender and race. i expected the power of the pollera would be manifest in the ring.


on sunday, i took a little tourist bus to la Ceja en El Alto, paid my 80 Bol, shivered, and watched. my previous hopes were not quite realized. now, don't get me wrong, i am not entirely disappointed. but what i found was more tourist spectacle than local phenomenon (and i wonder if half the local phenomenon is coming to see the crazy gring@s watch the event). and most of women's empowerment seemed to come from demasculinizing men: pulling down their pants, forcing them to wear skirts, etc. Of course, the men retaliated, at times by kissing them (what's that say about sexual violence?).

so the luchadoras are not quite the feminists i had hoped (though, this does not surprise me entirely). but i've also found a lovely little anarchist feminist group. now, i just have to figure out how this all fits together...

18 julio 2009

lucha manana

look what youtube recommended for me



(and seriously, traditional inca dress? try hacienda era...)

photografias

today i went to Bolivia's Palacio de Gobierno (which, i've been referring to as Evo's house, but he doesn't actually live there) & Plaza Murillo (named after Pedro Domingo Murillo).


(note El Alto in the background)

It was a nice sunny afternoon (as seems to be the norm here) and there were a lot of families out and about, as well as some strangely-clad, dreadlocked traveler types. Many of the women were in polleras, and I'm beginning to think that maybe all this about the pollera is over-emphasizing its importance. Certainly, clothing is always a choice, and expresses certain things about both individuality and collectivity. It is both constituitive of and influenced by identity. Of course. But i'm not sure a pollera has any more significance than my green chucks.

...but back to the plaza. There were lots of shoe-shine boys (who all wear ski masks), young bolivian teens selling books, and ice cream and jello vendors. There were also a few vendedoras selling balloons and inflatable balls. One (wearing a pollera) was fairly near me, and an older german guy kept trying to take her picture with his giant camera. She clearly did not like this. She kept turning away, and pulling her hat down over her face. But this dude in his cargo pants, hiking vest, and stupid hat was persistent. It was kind of making me mad, so I decided I would take his picture. Here it is....



Sure, who the hell am i to be acting as karma, and i'm sure he a) wouldn't care that i took his picture and b) will probably never know, but i thought i'd try to objectify him a bit.

later, i got pooped on by a pigeon. it was green and slimy. and older dutch guy sitting next to me also got hit, and we started a little conversation. but after we both got hit a second time, we decided the spot was too dangerous and both left. but that's supposed to be lucky, right?

Tomorrow I'm off to take some pictures (but hopefully not objectify any more than they want me to) the luchadoras in El Alto. 4 1/2 years in the making....

17 julio 2009

preguntas

About 7 years ago an acquaintance had an unattributed quote as her away message on AIM.

There are years that ask questions and years that answer.

I wrote it down and googled it to no avail (this was in the days before google was so good at searching books). But yesterday I read it as if for the first time. At the beginning of Chapter 3 (page 21 in my Perrenial Classics 1998 edition) of Their Eyes Were Watching God, Zora Neale Hurston writes, “There are years that ask questions and years that answer.”

This thought was my saving grace when I was 22, 23, 24. When I turned 25 the answers started coming almost immediately. But there are always spots along the way that start asking again. I wonder if its maybe days that ask questions now.

There are days that ask questions and days that answer. But some days are so confused, they don’t even know what question to ask.

mantequilla

for anyone who's been keeping up on the butter controversy, it seems to be settled.

it's official. MJ has no place in butter.

the Duff Dog will be happy

15 julio 2009

el dia de la paz

today was a city-wide holiday. this on the brink of the national bicentenial (sort of-its 200 years since a declaration of independence. which failed, at first). i saw a bit of a parade, and a strange protest i couldn't make sense of. masked young people holding hands in 4 or 5 rows, walking slowly through a plaza.


my only accomplishment was getting a slightly better sense of the city, and i made myself a nice google map. i also set up a time to meet with a friend on friday for beers. oh, and i figured out the hot water in the shower. that is certainly an important accomplishment.

but the lonliness has set in. its always hard to figure out a new place by yourself. especially when people like leap have high expectations of what you'll come back with. and its nothing new. it happened in austria, on the rez (yes, even with bii jih bah around), in lima, in carbondale, even in dc. but the ability to predict it does little to prevent it.

i'm convinced that a partner would change things drastically. i'm certainly more adventurous with a partner. its easier to walk into a bar and strike up a conversation. its easier to explore new areas. sit in a coffee shop without looking conspicuous (well, of course a couple of gringas look a little conspicuous). try new food. go to museums.

and certainly all these things are possible alone. they're just harder. especially for someone shy like me. especially for someone who's not so confident in their spanish like me. in essence, i need a field wife. someone who's up for a little adventure, but are willing to go along with my whims as related to my "research." the husbands of those like furnea, wolf, and turner don't know how good they had it. maybe this is just all whining and without merit, but i think there's something to be said for collaborative research, especially in the beginning. though i am most certainly not advocating people be arbitrarily stuck together based on common interests, and grant makers certainly wouldn't want to pay double for plane tickets and lodging, i think it might open doors more quickly.

in essence i'm jealous of those people like the jag, hgill, & rumagin that have an in.
maybe i should stick with small town karaoke. i've certainly got the background for that. but oh now....i have to go out on a limb to a place where i don't speak well, and try to make something of it. sigh. i hope this gets better (i mean, i know it will, but it didn't get THAT much better in peru)

14 julio 2009

la ciudad de nuestra senora de la paz

i'm here.




and one of the best parts is (this betrays what a dork i am), i get to go through my google task list and erase all the things i had to do to get here.

otherwise things are a bit overwhelming, and though my spanish is pretty much working, i'm going to have to use el dicionario to decipher the signs that tell me how to get agua caliente for my ducha. i guess its hard not to get a little freaked out the first night in a new place. especially when you're alone. especially when the language isn't quite comfortable. especially when you have high expectations for yourself.

09 julio 2009

p.s.

happy birthday papa franz!

a message from P-farm





yes, most awesomest man ever (even better than david harvey?)

07 julio 2009

el rey

merely a link

hee hee hee: michael jackson and the transgendered erotics of voice

aleatoria surtido

#1
this is a picture of the address listed for the bolivian consulate in chicago.



#2
fromedome wrote up something on his trip to peru. and since it makes me miss the land of pisco, i'll post the link.

#3
this is flippin' hilarious




#4
should i live here in la paz?

#5
if you read en espanol, this is also pretty incredible. well, sad, but crazy.

#6
once again, i've been scooped

Mamachas del Ring


Mamachas del Ring -Trailer - English from Betty Park on Vimeo.

01 julio 2009

so jealous.....

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2009/06/09/MN09183NV8.DTL

on visas

though he is the only (current or former) head of state of which i have ever been within throwing distance (and if you've ever seen me play softball, that's saying something), I am no Evo apologist. I do not think he is the anointed messiah. i do not see him as the direct spawn of the Pachamama or a reincarnation of Túpac Amaru. I do not think he and Barak Obama share as much in common and some would like.

That said, I also do not think he is one of Chavez's cronies. I generally like the guy. I think he is well-liked and well-equipped to navigate hard times for political leaders. I think he, though controversially, has the nation's best interests in mind, and though those interests are generally skewed in favor of the rural, indigenous, and poor (oh my, what a horrible thing!), he believes (and i do not necessarily disagree) that this is best for his nation as a whole.

But I've got a small bone to pick with him.

So, I've been trying to get a visa for Bolivia. And this is another story entirely, but phone numbers are disconnected, offices are empty (as in, even all the electrical fixtures have been ripped out), and emails go unreturned. Alas, I'm banking on an airport visa--but that's not the point of the story. The point of the story is, I may or may not need certain things to be allowed into the country.

You see, back in January 2007 (2 years after Evo's election), Bolivia started requiring U.S. citizens to have a visa to enter the country. This was done with much rhetoric about "reciprocity" and "Peoples' Diplomacy."

Ok, I'm with you there. The subtext I'm picking up on (and perhaps i'm reading too much into this, or am totally wrong about what i'm reading into it) is "well, yankees, you require all sorts of bullshit from us to visit your country, so if you want to come to ours, expect a hassle as well." And I'm fine with that. Despite the fact that I do rather enjoy the privileges i've been granted by virtue of being born an anglo-american woman with upwardly-mobile, college-educated parents in the United States, I know that the vast majority of the rest of the world is worse off, and my objective is not to rub it in their faces or take advantage of that. what's fair is fair. give me a hassle. i can take it.

My problem is, for a president who is so staunchly anti-neoliberal, his idea of "reciprocity" here supports some underlying principles of neoliberalism*. According to the information I have, in order to enter the country (though i have a feeling none of this will matter when i actually get there), I am required to

1. sign a sworn statement that basically just says who i am, and where i'm going

2. have a passport
ok, so i could deconstruct the class, economic, and time constraints here, but since this is now standard, i certainly do not place the blame on evo for this one, and will bypass complaining on this point.

3. a copy of a hotel reservation or invitation letter from a friend.
so, again, having an address at which you're staying is pretty standard, but i think it deserves a little scrutiny. it requires either social capital or economic capital. and not just any sort of social capital, but the kind in which your "friend" must a) have an address-which may seem picky, but i've been to plenty of places where the streets have no names, b) be literate, and c) have the capability to send you a "letter" either via the internet of by buying a stamp, envelope, paper, and some writing implement to send you this letter.
--now my point here is not to exoticize bolivians to a point at which i imply that none of them have the money to buy an envelope or stamps. but i think its worth keeping in mind that small things we all take for granted, in some contexts, are much bigger deals.

4. round trip ticket or travel itinerary
ok, fair enough. you don't want blanc@s to stay forever, and want proof we'll actually leave

5. bank statement showing "economic solvency"
i'm not sure what sort of balance proves "economic solvency," but i feel like this one needs no explanation.

6. yellow fever vaccination certificate
and here's my personal aversion. i took care of this yesterday, and it cost me a mere $474. There are costs for the "travel nurse consultation" "vaccine administration fee" (helpfully discounted if you receive more than one vaccine in one day), the cost of the actual vaccine, and "documentation fees." now granted, i did get a typhoid vaccine thrown in (for a mere $104 + the discounted $10 administration fee). but my god, that's 1/3 of my budget for the trip. well, 1/4 now that i had to add it on. that's more than i will spend on housing and food combined in bolivia for a month. that's more than i've spent on housing and food combined here in the US for the last month (though admittedly, i am living rent-free at the moment). but to me, and a LOT of people, that's a LOT of money.

7. visa fee of $135
again, fairly self-explanatory. i'll pay it because i have to, and i totally understand the rationale, but i'm not going to do it without questioning the underlying ideology that national borders are real things, and nation-states can impose silly rules and fees for those wanting to traverse imaginary lines....and if i were more in the mood to write today i'd tell a little story about the 4 corners 4 square team, but another day...

so when you add it all up, its

75.00 passport application fee
25.00 passport execution fee
1.36 postage for letter from bolivia (significantly less than $ required for email)
474.00 vaccines, etc.
135.00 visa fee
---------
710.36

just to get in the country. not including the cost of the roundtrip ticket or hotel reservation. and what it all adds up to is, to get in, you've got to have some serious cash, or serious cultural capital.

is that what you had in mind evo?



on an entirely different note, the visit to the travel immunization clinic did yield some interesting images ripe for anthropological examination. i'll leave you to your own defenses on this one though.





*and by neoliberalism, i mean the late-capitalist system of beliefs and associated institutions among which is the notion, specifically, that human value is equivalent to economic value, and citizenship--and sometimes belonging--hinge almost exclusively on the ability to contribute to consumerist networks.